As I made my way down from my hotel room in Las Vegas the butterflies were aflutter in me belly. The world was about to see my creation that I had been slaving over for several years and I had no idea what the reaction would be.
I knew the film was original and something that would most likely be polarizing for audiences, but I had no idea what critics or distributors would think. Would the world love my film? Would they hate it? Maybe they wouldn’t even care. Or worst of all, maybe they would never even have the chance to see it outside of this festival.
The elevator doors opened up to the main floor of the Palms Casino and I was inundated with the ringing bells and sounds of gambling in full swing. The thought hit me that being a filmmaker isn’t that different than a professional gambler; no matter how good you are at your craft, there is always a chance you will go bust. Then I realized that there is also the chance to hit it big…
So, with mixed emotions of fear and excitement flooding my brain, I began what felt like an epic journey through the casino to the movie theater. My whole world was buzzing and as I passed each table or slot machine things started moving slower and slower. One second was filled with utter despair as a gambler lost a hand. The next was exhilaration for someone hitting their number at the roulette table. Through it all I couldn’t shake the feeling of being out of control.
I tried to put on a calm exterior as I approached the entrance to the theater and as soon as I saw the lines cued up and realized it would be a full house, all the fears started to evaporate and appreciation for the experience filled the void. Family members, actors, friends and crew members littered the lines and I felt so much love and support that I knew no matter the outcome of the film, it was already success.
The screening went off without a hitch and the audience loved it. I was treated like a star, celebrating in the penthouse clubs, being ushered through lines, given drinks and introduced to the “important people I needed to meet”. Everyone was very complimentary and quoting lines from the film all night long.
When I awoke in the morning, I was surprised to find our Variety review, which to this day is one of the best reviews of a film I have ever read. The verdict was in and it turns out people actually appreciated my work. I had no idea if it would get out there through large distributors or what would come next.
While I knew all of that was incredibly important to the life of the film and the future of my career, I didn’t care. I knew that this was destined to be the most magical moment for me in the life of the project and I took great care to log every moment in my memory because as an artist, you never know when you will have the opportunity to do something special and this moment, this event, this screening and this movie were everything I could hope for in a creative experience.
